Darc Nite

The night is darkest before dawn

In one of my archived blog posts, I told a story about how some friends and I were downtown and I spontaneously felt moved to give away my spaghetti that I really didn't want. When given the opportunity, I questioned it so much that I missed my window of opportunity. What an awful feeling! Yesterday I ran to the grocery store to buy my favorite snack (Chocolate Turtle Chex Mix) and on my way in the store, I caught a glimpse of a man who was sitting by the door in a wheel chair. I saw that he was terribly burned and he had a box on his lap. Without doing a double-take, I went into the store and in my darkest hour of need, I decided that I was going to give all the money I had in my purse to him. On my way out the door I said a quick prayer of healing over the money (tangible things can transfer). I walked outside and there was a shopper talking to him so I walked up behind her and put the money in his jar. He looks at me and says "God bless you." I granted him the same thing. I don't feel proud because this is what we are suppose to do as believers. We are suppose to have open hands instead of closed fists. I feel optimistic about the restoration of this man, not just physically but everything he has lost. I am confident in the Word that prayers of the righteous make much change!

I was having a bleak moment before I went to the store. Things weren't looking so much in my favor and I almost had a moment of panic. No one knows your dealing better than you and no one can feel it like you. I shed a few tears and picked myself up quickly so I wouldn't fall in the ditch of sorrow. Though it feels like my darkest hour, I am not alone. Neither is the man who was burned. God will use you to be a blessing to others to get the focus off yourself. Swimming to shore and drying off is much better than floating away and losing sight of land (hope). I'm doing the backstroke all the way back to my shore. It's time I start taking my own medicine, lol!

Blood Type: Toxic

Anybody who has a luxury vehicle will tell you that luxury vehicles require a certain type of treatment, such as quality gas. If you put any other type of gas or even cheaper gas in the tank, your car won't perform at it's best as it would with quality gas. The engine eventually would probably corrode and shut down. The same is with our bodies. We were designed to consume quality foods (organic fruits, veggies, meat etc.). These organic foods work for our benefit as does quality gas for any vehicle. They supply our bodies with specific nutrients that treat every part of our body, inside and out. But slowly but surely we have moved away from pure foods for the sake of quick production. We intake sugars that corrode our organs, processed meats that our bodies struggle to breakdown, and so on. I wonder why we don't perform to our potential? Or where diseases come from? Could it be a combo of deficiencies in our diet and stress? Stress? Yea, from keeping up with the Johnsons and the Joneses. Wow, just had an epiphany! We treat our luxury vehicles better than our own bodies! We are full of toxins from the environment and food. Toxins are sitting and shutting our systems down. It's usually a domino effect. When one part shuts down, another goes down hill, and then another.

I don't know exactly when the "quick" schemes first came on the scene. I'm assuming when the microwave was invented. Or maybe fast food restaurants started the madness. Whatever the case, we as Americans especially are all about the quick schemes. Get rich quick, lose weight quick, find a mate quick, prepare dinner quick, shed years of aging QUICK! Then "easy" was added at the tail end of quick. Every infomercial's tag line is "It's quick and easy". Meaning, not much work involved. But we are catering to laziness and perpetuating impatience. We are like water molecules when heated up. Going fast and eventually crashing. Crashing into others and crashing ourselves. It's always at the tail end of things that we hurry to reverse the inevitable. Our whole lives we eat fried food, salty food, junk food, smoke, drink etc. and then at the end suffering from all types of self inflicted diseases, we're concerned. All these years, we have been adding to the landfills things that take 100years and more to decompose, or planting more industrial buildings than trees, and BIG vehicles. Now we are seeing the effect it's having on the environment and everyone is scrambling to be "green". Green isn't a new concept. It's always been a choice that was rarely chosen. Green was a hindrance to QUICK production. The township that I live in doesn't participate in picking up recycling bins because it's an "eye sore". WOW!

I don't want too say "too little too late" and be a pessimist. Better late than never I guess. In the meantime, what we can make drastic changes about is our diet. We were designed with resilient bodies. Wouldn't it be cool if we really did live in a dome of bubble wrap? Reality is that we don't, so be good to yourself because the one's feeding you the quick schemes don't care about you. Be good to our dome of earth, because we don't get a new one.

Rough Draft

Just a rough draft...kinda feel'n my way around to finish it.

He knows the lines of my frown
He knows the crack of my bones
He knows the freckles on my face
He knows when I abound and abase
He knows what I need beyond what I desire
He can calculate my next move
like playing checkers or a chess move
He know my favorite color
my favorite song that makes my stomach flutter
He dyed the color of my eys
Drew the lines of my smile
Fit my hand for a pen
and stirs my gift up from within
He amazes me constantly
Never rushes me along
because patience is his favorite song
The perfect gentleman I contend
I breathe the air of him
Get lost in daydreams of him
Every heartbeat is for him
.....
You are the warmth of the sun on my skin
You are the rain that makes my flowers bloom
You are the rest I get from work at noon
You are the wind that blows my hair
You are the sweet fragrance of the Spring air...

Opposite

Subliminal messages...a very discrete yet affective tactic. I feel like I have been a victim (in a good way) in the last couple days. Not from commercials or from implied ideas through conversation, but through music. Although music can have a direct and clear message, the frequency of the message is what has caught my attention. I stumbled upon an alternative Christian band called Leeland (they remind me of ColdPlay) last year and their new album was released recently called Opposite Way (single called Opposite Way). I purchased the CD, listened to it, and forgot about it within weeks. In the meantime Tye Tribbett has come out with his new album titled Stand Out. I listened to the single Stand Out and was immediately reminded of my growing up. I can say without a doubt that I NEVER fit in, and not by choice. I was raised differently than my friends and I never embraced my "sticking out like a sore thumb" image until I became an adult with spiritual maturity. I think that's what attracts people to ask questions and from asking questions, you have an opportunity to share Christ. I learned that I was made to be different and not blend it. But it's the most uncomfortable experience when you don't have an understanding of it.

Today I popped in my Opposite Way cd and listened to that very song. Lyrics:

Living in the same town
for all these years
Doing the same old things
hanging with the same crowd
and it's starting to get crippling
you never felt in place
and you tell yourself it's all okay
but something's different today
you want to run the opposite way
and it seems like you're locked in a cage
and you need to find a way of escape
when everyone's setting the pace- it's okay to run the opposite way

When we hear the phrase opposite way we think of it in a negative way, or going in the wrong way. But this is different, going opposite of the wrong way. Going away from the movement of the crowd. I realized that I have slowly reverted back to my old ways of being concerned with trying to blend in. In the skin of Tye Tribbett's CD is a picture of a pair of black, white and red Converse AllStar shoes amongst a pile of dull generic duplicate shoes. I was and am that pair of Converse shoes. It is a very vivid image and spoke to me as a reminder. These two songs reinforced in me what I have carelessly forgotten and the Lord is good enough to remind me of in a way I would understand. You don't want to be caught red handed bending yourself to be what you are not. In what way have you blended in? It's the one's who don't fit in who are in a position to become billboards. At one time or another we have all been captivated by someone who we have made notice of because something about them was different. We wanted to get to know them better, didn't we? Almost wanted to know the secret ingredient that made them so unique.

We are responsible for our own self, actions, what we say and what we don't say, what we do and what we don't do, especially for the sake of being "down" (we don't say that anymore). Self identity gets lost in the crowd along with every ounce of tenacity that drives us to battle right from wrong. I'm reminded of my Shepherd King who didn't fit in either. What if He did, would we be here today? What about that one person who was responsible for you turning your life around? If they we worried about fitting in, they might have missed you. I have a mandate and somebody is waiting on me to be at the right place at the right time, sticking out like a sore thumb. I can't afford to blend in. I am growing in grace and will not be afraid to run the "opposite way". I ask that you run with me.